What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 Teases Big Improvements for Future Updates - Push Square

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

He said he loves me, but why is it difficult for him to leave his wife?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What are some alternatives to wearing a bra? Why do some women feel pressure to wear bras even though there may not be any benefits?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

How did you know you weren't the narc?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

I have a "fat pussy" and I'm super self cautions about it. Do guys think it's gross?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Make Nazis afraid again!

Should Pete Rose's record as the all-time hits leader be recognized and celebrated?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Who's your celebrity crush?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

TEXT:

What kind of book did you write after turning 55?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

What is the degree of influence of Saudi Wahhabism on the modern Muslim world?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Why am I tired all the time?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

What is the best phrase that sums up Tim Burton's Netflix Wednesday series cast? What is your unedited opinion about it?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)